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Networking is about Saying “No”

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(Excerpt from The Networker’s Guide to Success by Jan Triplett)

Sometimes, you just need to say "NO"!

Sometimes, you just need to say “NO”!

Not all groups are right for you to join and give your valuable time and effort. Not all people are key to your networking success. It’s not about the numbers. It’s about knowing when to say “Yes” and more importantly, when to say “No”.

There have been times when I just said no. That’s hard for those of us who use networking to do, but it’s vital.

At some point your time, money, and energy run out. Before it gets to be a crisis, back off for a while. Reconsider how you are networking. Remember, you are responsible for helping your current networks as well as helping yourself. In networking, you have to be constantly on the lookout for new additions and people to add to your current networks, or even new networks to join. In addition, other people will invite you to join their network. You are going to have to say “no” or “not right now” to some of them. It’s okay.

In Austin, there are between ten and twenty new networks, Meetup groups, and new formal and informal associations that are formed each month. An equal number fold or change. There may be even more opportunities where you live. You have to decide what’s right for you and what’s not.

Take a minute to consider how much time, effort and money you’re willing to invest and at what rate of return. Make sure you also consider what you can invest. Say “yes” to the people, organizations, meetings, lunches, etc. with the highest value to meet your goals; say “no” to the rest. You can always change your mind if your situation or theirs changes.

For ways to look at organizations before you take the plunge, read my post about what’s wrong with many networking meetings. You also might want to check out  Jerry Ussem’s post that discusses various experts opinions on why it pays to be a jerk sometimes. He quotes research from the University of Amsterdam that found that semi-obnoxious behavior not only can make a person seem more powerful, but can make them more powerful. Your goal should be to be ok with being perceived as obnoxious by some if you say “no”.

Network-guide-to-success-coverv42More ideas on networking success are in The Networker’s Guide to Success ebook available from the Business Success Center and online at Apple, Amazon and Nook.

 

Heroes and Mentors

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Heroes and mentors are inspiring. They are both unique. They can be household names or unknown and unsung. Both are remarkable in their own ways. Both have the potential of great power and influence over others.

Everyone needs heroes and everyone needs mentors but they are not usually the same person. If you listen to others, you will hear the names of both. You will also get an idea of the value of each one. This can help you in your own quest to find the right person to help you develop and grow your business and your life. [Read more…]

Your Mentor May Be Close at Hand

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Where can you find someone who is just what you need? They may be sitting next to you reading the paper. Look around.

Personal Mentors

I’ve had several wonderful personal mentors. My godmother, Northwestern University professor Alvina Krause, had “teas”. At these salons, I learned the fine art of  conversation. My grandmother taught me the importance of family. My mother  helped me find my voice and be comfortable being myself. She always said, “We grew up together”. Maybe so, but she was also my guide. [Read more…]

Mentoring Is All About Choice

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Do you want to find a mentor? Do you want to be a mentor? As Pamela Ryckman says, the author of Stiletto Network: Inside the Women’s Power Circles That Are Changing the Face of Business.,  “Mentoring—or at minimum connecting with a variety of people in all industries and age groups—has never been more important.”

Having a successful experience as a mentor or as a mentee is dependent on the choices you make before and during the relationship.  You can be better prepared to use mentoring if you understand what each side is expecting and what choices have to be made. If you already use mentoring, consider how you made your choices.  There are ways to improve the experience for both of you. [Read more…]

Networking Rules for Friends

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4 More Networking Rules: Successful Networking with Friends

There are standard Networking Rules that can be applied most of the time. But friends aren’t just anybody and they deserve some special attention. Consider using these rules with the most valuable people in your formal and informal networks and when doing personal networking with friends, family, and others who are close to you. [Read more…]

Ghost Competitors Are Out to Get Your Sales

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Photo by Adam Kusmierz from flickr.com

Photo by Adam Kusmierz from flickr.com

Ghost competitors. They come out at night. They come out during the day. They come when you are awake. They come when you are asleep. They come when you are at work or at play. They are always there. Lurking.

There are four of them; like the four horsemen of the apocalypse. They ride down on you. You can’t fight them so you need to be vigilant and get out of the way. They seem harmless or well meaning. But, beware!

Who are they?

Your worst nightmares:

  1. Government
  2. Non-profit and tax exempts
  3. DIYers
  4. DNAAs [Read more…]

8 Ways to Avoid Networking Burnout

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(from The Networker’s Guide to Success*)

Too many options can lead to networking burnout

Too many options can lead to networking burnout

What’s Networking Burnout? It’s like other kinds of emotional burnout.  You get it from doing too much and not “giving it a rest”. It can happen at any time but people are extremely vulnerable at the end of the year or end of a quarter when they begin to focus on what’s not done.

I was recently at a meeting and someone I respect said if you’re a good networker, you’re always networking. She may be right but it can be draining so don’t let it happen to you. [Read more…]